Castor And Pollux

Pondering and reveling through weeks of introspection and how surfacing through it has left me respectful through all the changes survived within my life with all the lessons learned, which in itself is masterful. Reaching a conclusion of how the familiar is not necessarily the right path taken and now sometimes contrasts are better when left to art and artist.  Even within life's chaos I found contrasts and meanings without actually living it daily. But when comfort is found, when focus finally finds you and even if it means your the sad face in the crowd for awhile; does that really matter anyway?
People, places and faces are distorted to me and no longer hold the key to that mystery of my life's happiness.. Equally easier to move on and past that black hole of boredom and redundancy.
A strange force when reckoning my soul, accepting of my loyalty to self as one of beauty instead of misinterpreted strangeness as I watch the spectators do what they do...speculate.
They're strangely sluggish and high with ideas while doing nothing. Wasting time as if it won't end and borrowing from generations past as an affinity. Stalemated, safe and self appointed is the easy road and I'd rather remain confused but certain, lost while endlessly searching and tormented like an artist while wide eyed in the all wonderment of the unfamiliar, than live with a safety net among an oppressing shadow. And now it gives refreshed enlightenment to what's real.
Age brings tenacity...and one finds the courage to resist the familiar...looking upon it as superficial as I've always done but with more courage than ever before. There IS a comfort as crone-hood is at my step. Neither familiar nor unexciting. Castor and Pollux are my contrast and we're learning to live together, finally.